Stages of Development
On this website, you will find some of the things that children do by certain ages. No two children develop, grow or learn in the same way or do things at the same pace. They do, however, develop in predictable ways. If you are concerned about your child’s grown, development or learning, contact your doctor, a public health nurse or the BC Nurses Help Line (811). Find information about your child’s stage of development under the “Parenting Information” tab at the top of the website.
A Better Way . . . .
Positive discipline, based on love and limits, is common sense. It’s often the simple, sensible choices we tend to overlook as options, especially when we’re in the heat of a kid battle. Unlike punishment, positive discipline works to maintain the dignity of both child and parent by helping the child want to cooperate because he knows it’s the right thing to do, not because he feels he has to comply “or else.” It has three main objectives:
- To put a stop to misbehavior (such as whining, lying, hitting, tantrums).
- To encourage good behaviors (i.e., cleaning up, healthy eating, using manners).
- To strengthen the relationship between parent and child.
The starting place for positive discipline is with you. It involves modeling good behavior – the kind you’d like from your child. As you have already discovered, children will do as you do, not necessarily as you say. To review the kind of behavior you expect, schedule private discussions and family meetings to revisit a situation without blame, shame, fear, or guilt. When the child has input into solving the problem, he is more inclined to want to cooperate as planned when a similar situation arises. The process helps him feel important. But keep in mind that you have full veto power. Over time, a well-disciplined child learns to control his impulses, take responsibility, solve problems, and empathize with others.
In truth, changing your ways and your children’s isn’t easy, and it can be especially difficult to hold it together on crazy mornings. But even if you find that what comes out of your mouth is not what you had practiced, don’t worry. Your child will give you another chance – sooner than you think – to say it better.